Interact Journal Integrative Ideas for the Process-Oriented Psychotherapist

Categories Supervision Dialogs

On not having answers

I’m not the man with the answers. Yet she frequently asks me what to do.

Even though you never have the answers, you can always tell her what to do in any given moment. Here is what you can tell her.

“Attend to and connect with yourself here and now.”

“Trust yourself completely.”

“Breathe. Introspect. Be curious. Allow yourself to be who you are, right this minute.”

She wants to be in a childlike place and give away her power.

Explicitly take her power and then, coming from an Ideal, Loving Parent place, give her power back.

Her: Such and such happened. What should I do?

You: Focus internally. Connect with your physical or emotional experience right now.

Direct attention inward.

Him: I want such and such. At the same time, I want the opposite. Part of me thinks I shouldn’t want anything at all. What should I do?

You: Breath slowly and deeply. Listen to your breath as it goes in and out of your lungs. What do you notice?

Invite into the present.

Her: Sam said this and did that! What should I do?

You: Imagine Sam is in this empty chair. Pay attention to your inner truth. Tell Sam what you want.

Invite a metaphor.

“This object represents the answer.” (Wait to see what she does with that, and work with the response.)

Invite her subconscious to show her an answer.

“With your eyes closed say to yourself, ‘What should I do?’ and allow an image to form in your mind.”

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